hmmm… suppose i could find the revised one…

Past, Present, Future, Love

I’m lonely, but I’m not alone
I’m a pessimist, so my bed and my heart are both half empty
You may have known the happier me
It seems these days I can come off desparate

I don’t want it to be that way
Its just how things are
Sometimes I can go for a drive
And listen to old songs that remind me of those better times

When life was easier and not so damn confusing
Perhaps it’s my fault, after all, I tend to overthink
A lot
And thats not healthy

But what is these days?
I have no regrets
There were no bitter breakups
No hearts broken because I love yous were spoken
Too soon

In fact I’ve never said those words
Except to my mother or sisters or brother or best friends
And you weren’t any of those things
You are gone, but you live on in memories and pictures
You aren’t gone, you are making new memories and taking new pictures

It is nobodies fault
Perhaps it is my fault if anything, because now there is apathy
Not sadness, not loneliness
Not anger, towards any of you
None of you left me broken or alone, well I guess alone
But I’m not bitter
There is no resentment
Only a longing to find someone

Blueprint is a weird word to use for somebody I want to love one day
But you are her, it’s just a shame I never took a shot
I guess that is my one regret, not taking the risks
Settling for relationships that both of us settled into

Nothing so serious as to saying those words one longs to here
But a spark that makes you think it could be something
Only to not see it get there

I can close my eyes and think of you
The one I have never met but love already
It may be strange but the past is gone and I want to only see you
My future wife